The Extinction of Experience: Being Human in a Disembodied World

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American Enterprise Institute Senior Fellow and author Christine Rosen joins Jeff this week to discuss the impact of technology and our supposedly “connected” world this week. If you’re concerned about human relations between individuals and at the social level – and our political discourse – don’t miss this thoughtful discussion. Get Christine’s book here.

The irony is stark: we live in the most connected era in human history, yet many of us have never felt more isolated. This paradox forms the foundation of “The Extinction of Experience,” a compelling new book that examines how our increasing dependence on technology is fundamentally altering our capacity for genuine human connection. The author’s insights reveal how screens have become the primary mediators of our daily experiences, slowly eroding our ability to engage directly with the world around us.

The False Promise of Digital Connectivity

When social media platforms first emerged, they came bearing the promise of a more interconnected world—a global village where distance would no longer separate us. Yet, as the author argues, this technological revolution has delivered something quite different. While we can instantly communicate with people across the globe, these interactions often lack the depth and substance of face-to-face encounters. Digital platforms excel at fostering shallow engagement but frequently fail to nurture meaningful relationships.

The book points to a fundamental mismatch between how humans evolved to interact—in small, intimate groups with direct physical presence—and the mediated, screen-based experiences that now dominate our lives. This disconnect extends beyond personal relationships into politics, culture, and family dynamics, creating ripple effects throughout society. The concern isn’t merely nostalgic longing for simpler times but a recognition that something essential to human experience is slipping away.

The Vanishing Art of Face-to-Face Interaction

Perhaps the most troubling consequence of our digital dependence is the decline in basic social skills, particularly among younger generations. Employers increasingly report that new hires lack fundamental abilities that previous generations took for granted: making eye contact, engaging in polite conversation, or handling impatient customers with grace.

This deterioration of interpersonal skills manifests in broader social phenomena as well. Road rage incidents, political polarization, and general impatience all reflect a society that’s losing its capacity for the give-and-take of human interaction. We’ve grown accustomed to the immediate gratification of likes and shares, leaving us ill-equipped for the messy, often frustrating reality of dealing with actual people in physical spaces.

In educational settings, the impact is equally profound. Studies show that students who take handwritten notes retain information more effectively than those typing on laptops. Writing by hand forces learners to process and summarize information in real time, creating stronger neural pathways and deeper engagement with the material. Yet despite this evidence, digital tools continue to replace traditional methods, often to the detriment of learning outcomes.

Digital Distraction and the Family Sphere

The intrusion of digital devices into family life represents another dimension of this shifting landscape. Parents struggle to manage their children’s screen time while often being equally tethered to their own devices. Family dinners, once a sacred space for connection and conversation, now compete with the constant pings of notifications and the allure of endless scrolling.

For children and adolescents, constant exposure to digital stimulation has troubling implications. The platforms they use are deliberately designed to capture attention through instant rewards and quick dopamine hits. This conditioning undermines their capacity to develop patience, handle frustration, and engage in the face-to-face social interactions crucial for emotional development.

The consequences extend to cognitive development as well. The habit of constant digital distraction fragments attention and discourages deep thinking. Young people increasingly struggle with sustained concentration, a skill essential not only for academic success but for navigating complex relationships and life challenges.

The Transformation of Romance in the Digital Age

Few areas of human experience have been more dramatically altered by technology than dating and romantic relationships. Dating apps have revolutionized how people meet potential partners, but this abundance of choice has fostered a marketplace mentality that transforms people into commodities to be swiped through and evaluated based on curated online personas.

The author argues that this approach to romance has cultivated impatience and perfectionistic expectations. When a seemingly endless supply of alternatives is just a swipe away, the motivation to work through difficulties or accept ordinary human flaws diminishes. Many quickly abandon promising connections at the first sign of imperfection, perpetually chasing an idealized relationship that exists only in imagination.

Further complicating matters, easy access to information and the pervasive influence of pornography have distorted expectations about both relationships and physical intimacy. The slow, organic process of getting to know someone—with all the uncertainty and vulnerability that entails—has given way to a more calculated approach that often leaves both parties feeling unsatisfied.

Creativity and Serendipity in the Workplace

The shift to remote work, accelerated by recent global events, has revealed another casualty of our increasing digital dependence: workplace creativity. Companies like Pixar once deliberately designed their offices to encourage random encounters between employees from different departments, recognizing that such unplanned interactions often spark innovative ideas.

Digital tools claim to enhance serendipity but fail to replicate the organic connections that occur naturally in physical spaces. The spontaneous conversations by the coffee machine, the casual lunch discussions, the unexpected hallway meetings—these moments matter more than we realized. Their absence has left a void that video calls and chat platforms cannot fill, leading to a measurable decline in collaborative innovation.

Additionally, constant digital connection has eroded the natural mind-wandering and daydreaming that fuels creative thinking. When every moment of boredom becomes an opportunity to check email or scroll through social media, we lose the mental space where many of our most creative ideas emerge.

Reclaiming Human Connection

Despite these concerning trends, the author remains cautiously optimistic. The solution isn’t to abandon technology entirely but to be more intentional about how we use it. Simple practices like avoiding phone use during brief waiting periods—in traffic, before meetings, in checkout lines—can create space for mental clarity and mindfulness.

More broadly, making conscious choices about when to embrace digital tools and when to resist them can help restore balance. The key question isn’t whether technology can automate a particular experience, but whether automation genuinely improves our lives or merely displaces valuable human interaction.

By recognizing what’s at stake and making deliberate choices, we can begin to counter the extinction of experience. Technology should serve human connection, not replace it. The path forward involves neither wholesale rejection of digital innovation nor uncritical acceptance, but a thoughtful integration that preserves what matters most: our capacity to be fully present with one another in a shared physical world.